Of Leaky eyes

Yes, my eyes have been leaking more than usual..I am actually crying. Instead of retreating as usual to the safer landscapes of cleaning incessantly or washing every last piece of even questionable laundry.. I am allowing the rain to come, the storm to rage.. 
I am astonished that my howl so resembles that of a desperate cry from a wolf in the badlands. I frightened myself initially with this foreign wail...

 How I relate to you sad yet mighty beast..how my heart feels your pain

Right now the form taken by my grief is beyond my control...this primal place where I had stashed the unimaginable reality of my husbands death is breaking wide open and screaming for release, I am powerless to hold it back.

My Lord has promised not to forsake me, my Faith is in him.